How I Cope with Death...Happy Father's Day to All Those in Heaven

*edited yearly to correct amount of time passed*

This will be my 7th Father's Day without my dad and it will be 8 years since I lost him at the end of July. I'm no expert, at the end of the day I'm still just  a girl who lost her father. But I have grieved just as all of the other daughters and sons who have lost their own father, so I thought I'd share what works for me.

We lost my dad in under a year and the end of his (physical) life was pretty quick. He had come down with his third bout of pneumonia due to the leukemia and we just thought they'd go through the same procedure and he'd come home. But that never happened. That week was hell because they'd put him on life support without my moms consent. I never went up because I didn't want to remember him with tubes all over him and, to this day, it is a decision I don't regret. I gave my mom a letter to read to him and I know his soul was with me as I wrote it, as he was preparing to go to heaven. I also did see him after they took the machines off and he held on for 3 hours and 15 minutes.

I grieved hard, like any typical daddy's little girl. I still grieve and have my days. But I also have more faith in the spirit world than I do of earth. We never die, we just change form. My dad is still with me every day, hanging out with me as I lay out in the sun especially. And he's healthy, whole and not in any pain. He's got his hands full again with my brother up there with him! Sure, summer is harder knowing it was my dad and brother's (who we also lost) favorite season, as well as mine. But trusting and knowing that he (they) are still around enjoying it with me, and even a part of creating it now, gives me peace.

On Father's Day, my dad's birthday and other holidays I always like to remember the good times. Not the hard or sad times, not even the heartwarming good times that would still make me cry. My dad was a funny guy, though often times he'd say I was the only one who got his humor. So I like to remember and reflect on the moments that will keep a smile on my face, a laugh in my belly and love in my heart. That is my wish for all of you reading this now who also lost your fathers.

Happy Father's Day to all of the fathers, both on earth and in heaven and to all of the mothers who are also dad too! Happy Father's Day, Daddy💖